One of the moms I’m coaching sent me an article on moms and stress from the site, Modern Mom. Wow. It didn’t beat around the bush or try to sugar-coat the issue. It didn’t say, “There, there. You have so much on your plate. Of COURSE you’re stressed.” It acknowledged the stress and then said, straight up, that many moms are addicted to stress.  I believe it.

The article goes on to say that a little stress is good. It can “keep you on your toes” and help you tap into your aliveness. But when your “aliveness” morphs into “lividness” (ok–I made up that word!), something’s gotta give. For many of us moms, what gives is our sanity and peace of mind.

The truth? Adrenaline is as addictive as crack.  I’d prefer to think that my idea of a high was working out on the eliptical or enjoying a cup of  coffee. But  the truth hurts. Worrying and stressing about how things will ever get done or what others think of me or how much is on my plate keeps me stuck. And sometimes stuck feels good. Or at least it feels better than taking action.  Is that wrong? Nope. Is it where I want to stay? Nope.  The goal is to use the stress as a wake-up call that I need to pay attention to something in my life: my health, my parenting, etc.

Staying stressed is like hitting the snooze button repeatedly so you can sleep more. It can become a comfortable habit that deludes you into thinking you’re doing something productive.  I don’t think we can “Just Say No to Stress.” Stress happens. We can, however, choose to acknowledge that we feel it, and then release it. Creating art journal pages (even for 5 minutes) helps me let go of it.  Sometimes it’s taking a breath and closing my eyes.

One of the most important steps to managing stress is to be willing to notice and acknowledge it. Once you do that, you can take a time out and “reset” yourself so that you can act differently.  The important thing is to stop functioning on autopilot and start becoming aware of your reactions. Once you’re aware, you can use the adrenaline of the moment to propel you towards balance (whatever that looks like for you). Being in a chronic state of adrenaline rush keeps you on the hamster wheel of life. Being willing to acknowledge the stress and then do one small thing to take care of yourself moves you from addiction and autopilot to awareness and freedom.